Member-only story
HUNGRY SKIN
The Forbidden Pleasure of Desiring What Doesn’t Exist
While couples outside were faking orgasms, Thomas Winters took pride in at least faking entire people. Thirty-four years of absolute sexual incompetence masked by a brilliant career in architecture — ironic how he built intimate spaces for other bodies to meet when the only body he knew deeply was his own, always alone.
“It’s easier to build walls than to tear them down,” Thomas muttered, as his hand slid inside his pants, caressing the only truly satisfying relationship he had ever experienced. The notifications on his phone blinked insistently — like electronic fireflies promising the warmth of a connection that never managed to heat his touch-starved skin.
Thomas watched the city through the window of his tenth-floor apartment. The lights began to turn on like little earthly stars, while he contemplated the chasm between his life and those he imagined happening inside each illuminated window. It was Wednesday, halfway through the week, and his routine unfolded with the precision of a Swiss watch — wake up, work, eat, sleep. Repeat.
“Maybe today will be different,” he thought, as his fingers slid across his phone screen until he found the dating app he had downloaded three months ago. Dozens of conversations started, all dying after a few exchanged…
